How to Be a Cool Guy

10 Characteristics of a Cool Guy

Being a cool guy is simple but not easy. Knowing how to be a cool and living like one are two different things – but once you have the information all you need is awareness and practice. Below I’ve listed 10 characteristics of all cool guys. Even having 7-8 of these characteristics will certify you as an official cool guy, if you can make them a permanent part of your life. These 10 characteristics are not all-inclusive but they represent the overall make-up of what it takes to be a cool guy.


#1 – Be Confident

All cool guys are confident, period. The fake cool guys will sometimes try to act confident but what really comes out is arrogance. When you know the difference between confidence and arrogance, you are on your way to becoming a cool guy.

Confidence means you believe in yourself no matter the circumstance or situation and no one and nothing will ever change that. Confident is as strong as a diamond and as unmovable as a mountain. Arrogance, on the other hand, is the belief that you are better than everyone else, that other people are in some way inferior to you. Arrogance is fleeting because situations can cause that belief to waiver – if you lose a challenge or are proven wrong in a debate. When you are arrogant and you lose, your belief in yourself falters. When you are confident and you lose, nothing changes – you’ve only learned how not to win and the next time you will have to do something different to be successful. That is the mindset of a cool guy.


#2 – Never Complain. Ever.

Look, shit happens. We know that, we all know that. But cool guys never complain. When things don’t go our way, we recognize it and adjust. Adapt and overcome. Being vocal about why things aren’t working or wishing that they would work doesn’t change anything. In fact, being openly negative brings the people around you down and NEVER CHANGES THE SITUATION. Things are as they are, complaining about it doesn’t solve anything.

When things go wrong (or not the way you had planned), observe and adjust. Be quiet about the situation you’re in rather than saying out loud how bad the situation is. Force your mind to find a solution to the problem instead of vocalizing the problem for everyone to hear. That’s complaining. Don’t do it. Cool guys don’t do it, so you shouldn’t either. You can be positive about the situation by finding a solution or you can just be quiet about it. And let me say this: if the bad situation ONLY concerns you and no one else, don’t even mention it to other people – keep it to yourself. Your problems are not other people’s problems – cool guys don’t bring other people into their problems.


#3 – Wear Oakley Sunglasses

All cool guys wear Oakley sunglasses. I don’t know why, but we do. It’s just a thing.


#4 – Present Good Posture

Cool guys always have good posture. Always. It can be when walking, running, sitting, driving, or even sleeping. Good posture is a sign of confidence, health, and an awareness of your body as it moves. There are people with good posture that are not cool guys but you cannot be a cool guy without good posture.

Walking – keep your head up, don’t look at the ground. Look at the horizon or slightly upward, just over the head of people if you’re shorter or at the bottom of a second story building if you’re taller. This will help you keep your chest up and prevent slouching. Pull your shoulders back so you present a wide frame but not so much that you stick your chest out. Pace is fluid and steady, light and ready to react when necessary.

Standing – Same as above with weight evenly distributed between both feet. Arms should hang loosely to the side and relaxed.

Sitting – Sit upright with or without your back against the back of the chair. Never slouch. Your feet should be out in front of you, both feet on the ground. Do not cross your legs at all, even at the ankles. Avoid tucking your feet under your body or chair, allow them to extend in front of you.

In general, how you feel with determine how you present yourself. If you are confident, you will present a confident posture. Contrived postures will come off as unnatural and uneasy. Stay relaxed, calm, and confident with yourself.


#5 – Smile

Yes, cool guys smile. We are not so serious unless seriousness is required. When you meet someone, either for the first time or greeting them for the day, smile when you look at them, use their name, and say hello. Use a first handshake when greeting.

A smile will make you approachable. People gravitate towards positive, confident people – people gravitate towards cool guys. When you smile, people want to talk to you and feel comfortable with you. The smile is the universal sign of friendliness and is an important characteristic of a cool guy. Combine a genuine smile with a strong handshake and eye contact and you’ve put forth a power display of confidence that people admire.


#6 – Be Professional

All cool guys are professional, regardless of their profession. Professionalism means rising above the situation and doing what is required of you. Being a professional doesn’t necessarily mean being a specialist but it does mean they are committed to getting the job done, no matter what the requirements are.

There is a misconception that being politically correct is a part of being professional. This is a myth. If being professional is like confidence, then being politically correct is like arrogance. The two are not the same and are mutually exclusive. Cool guys are professional; they know their job and they do it to the best of their abilities regardless of what other people think. Being politically correct means sacrificing doing your job to the best of your abilities sometimes when it matters what other people think, i.e. society.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a pilot or a garbage man, when you’re a cool guy you do your job with excellence. Cool guys know this: how you do anything is how you do everything. We are always professional and execute our tasks with virtuosity.


#7 – Take Responsibility

Responsibility for your actions is paramount when you’re a cool guy. Every choice you make is done with intent because you know that when the good times go bad, you’re going to have to stand for your actions.

Having a sense of personal responsibility means that you cannot shift any blame to anyone else. When things work out, it’s because you did the right things at the right time. When things go wrong, it’s because your actions caused a failure at some point to create the situation. There is no other math involved – there is only you. Clearly, this lends itself to #1 and #2 – when you’re confident you know that your actions caused the outcome (good or bad) and when things don’t go your way it’s on you so don’t complain about it.


#8 – Stay Physically Fit

Cool guys care about their health and performance. Being able to accomplish any task is a part of what makes a cool guy ‘cool’. When the task requires physical prowess, you had better be ready.

Staying healthy requires eating clean, training hard, and living life. Eating clean means avoiding processed food and absolutely no sugar. Training hard means lifting weights and working out at the gym 5-7 times a week. Living life means getting in the experiences that only a strong, healthy person can get. Experiences like hiking mountains, SCUBA diving off-shore and off-boat, camping and roughing the outdoors, even participating in a competitive or recreational sports league.

Having an above average level of fitness is a requirement for cool guys. Not all cool guys have shredded abs or bulging biceps, but they are all above the above average level of human performance. Cool guys should be able to run, jump, swim, throw, punch, kick, squat, push, and pull better than most people. It’s not about how you look, it’s all about what you can do.


#9 – Show Respect

When you meet a cool guy, they will immediately show you respect for being a human being. There are cases when respect must be earned and cool guys know this – when it comes to doing a job, for example. But cool guys also know that all people deserve the basic level of respect for who they are and where they have come from. No cool guy will ever disrespect someone for no reason.

When you show respect to another human being, you are interested in them. You look them in the eye when you talk to them and inquire about their life – who they are and what they’ve done. Cool guys have a sense of the middle way and know that all people deserve a degree of respect until they lose it or earn more of it.


#10 – Have an Opinion

Cool guys have opinions. We will listen to everybody and hear what is being said, inquire about other people and find out stuff about them, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have our own ideas. Just like being confident, having an opinion is a part of knowing yourself.

When cool guys have an opinion, however, they do not force it onto others. Cool guys do not tell other people what to do or what to think. They can agree or disagree but they don’t try to make you believe what they do. Why? Because it doesn’t matter! Everybody is entitled to an opinion and if it’s not the same as yours that doesn’t make it wrong or unworthy. Cool guys know that having an opinion is strong, forcing your opinion is weak.


BONUS
#11 – Total Awareness

As a bonus, I am going to give you one more characteristic of a cool guy. Cool guys have total awareness of their body, their mind, and the spaces around them. They can see the future through their minds-eye and create what they see with action and follow-through. This awareness is where they draw confidence from and gain insight into how to be successful.

All the above 10 characteristics of a cool guy come from being aware of mind, body, and spirit. There are many more characteristics but even those are just manifestations of awareness. When you have awareness of yourself and your environment, you will present yourself relaxed, at ease, and with the confidence that draws people to you.

There is it – everything you need to be a cool guy. Now it’s up to you to learn and practice. It may feel strange at first but in time it will become natural to you. If you have any question, please leave them in the comments below.

4 Replies to “How to Be a Cool Guy”

  1. Jamie

    Hi there! Interesting article. You bring up some really good points. I think this is good advice that a lot of guys should pay attention too. Thanks for putting it into words.

  2. MattysMom

    Great and interesting post! More guys should definitely read this! I think you hit the nail on the head with how to be a cool guy 🙂 Thanks for sharing! Is that you and your dog jumping out of a plane? Awesome!

    • Kevin

      Hi Leahrae –

      Hahaha, thank you.

      No the picture is of a buddy of mine. I am the one taking the photo – I jumped after he did. No selfies. 😉

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